Self - June 12, 2020

What I Learned from Saying No This Month

white dress for summer
brighton keller wearing white dress

Hey, friends! Most of you probably know by now that I took most of the month of May off from creating my usual amount of content for BTD and scaled WAY back. I’m starting to ease back into my normal groove this month and wanted to take a minute to share with y’all a few things I learned simply by acknowledging my own feelings and saying no.

I totally realize that not everyone can alter their work schedule in this way and that taking this time off from a big part of my job is a privilege of what I do for a living. However, when I was reflecting on the last month and thinking about what I could share from my experience that would be helpful, I think there are takeaways for everyone. So I hope this helps anyone who’s feeling pressure not only from their job but from within themselves to always be going, going, going.

Pressing pause is OK

One of the things I struggle with the most when it comes to my job is the pressure to CREATE CREATE CREATE. And right when I think I’ve created something awesome, I scroll through Instagram and see someone else doing it “better”. This mindset is detrimental to my health physically and mentally, so I’ve been working hard over the past few years to recognize when I’m approaching a breaking point.

When I know I’m getting to that point, I try to take a step back and hit PAUSE. It allows me space and time to deal with my anxieties and the pressure to always be creating. Honestly, it’s one of the best things I’ve learned to do for myself. I still sometimes find myself worrying about becoming irrelevant because if I’m not popping up on your feeds for too long, I’ll be forgotten, but we all need a pause every now and then in order to be our best selves. So if you’ve been thinking about pressing pause, this is your sign to DO IT!

Saying no can open the door for other amazing opportunities

When you put yourself in the yes mindset, your time can quickly get clogged up with things you’re not even sure you truly care about. And that can prevent you from being able to say yes to things you actually want to do – both personally and professionally. In the last few weeks, because I decided to start saying no, I was able to take a last-minute weekend trip to Aspen. This might seem like something small, but it felt AMAZING to have the opportunity pop up and without thinking, be able to go.

With that said, I challenge you over the next month or so to look at your commitments. Which ones are really serving you? What things can you eliminate to free up more time for YOU? This doesn’t make you selfish. On the contrary, it means you want to be able to give your best to your work and to the people in your life, and you can’t pour from an empty cup (kind of a cheesy analogy, but it’s so true!).

Hobbies are important

Have you ever been in a job interview or maybe talking with someone new about your interests and they ask what your hobbies are and you have nothing to say? This used to happen to me all the time. It’s what helped me realize something had to change because I literally couldn’t think of anything that didn’t relate to my work. Now I have hobbies like cooking and walking and I’m even getting into hiking! Brighton from a few years ago wouldn’t have made time for things like this, but the Brighton of today wants to put more focus on and give more time to the things that light her up!! It’s so, so worth taking a step back from work or other commitments to give this time back to myself.

I hope this resonated with some of you and showed you that taking a break and saying no is 100% OK! Don’t feel guilty for needing to do what’s best for you!


Outfit Details: White Dress (wearing size XS) // Sandals (these run a little small, I’d recommending size up 1/2 to 1 full size) // Crossbody tote // Gold beaded bracelets