Motherhood - April 8, 2022

Pregnancy No. 2 First Trimester Q&A

Brighton Butler wearing free people smocked dress and miron crosby boots

Ahh I can’t believe I’m writing another pregnancy Q&A. It feels like just yesterday I was writing this blog post to answer your questions about my first pregnancy. The past year has been such a whirlwind and has absolutely flown by. I’m sure everyone with an infant feels that way, but it’s so true!

We’re beyond excited to be doing this again. I honestly can’t wait to see Four as a big brother. I’ve always imagined having my kids close together, and God was SO good to bless us with another little one who will be less than two years apart from Four.

I know y’all had a lot of questions about the timing of this pregnancy and how I’ve been feeling this time around, so I decided to do another Q&A like last time so I could address these questions all in one place.

It’s my hope that this post can serve as a resource for those of you who are expecting or hoping to become pregnant soon. It can be such a beautiful season, but it’s also really hard for a lot of reasons. I found so much comfort in finding other women who were going through the same thing as me!

Outfit Details: Dress (wearing size XS) // Miron Crosby Boots // Sunglasses // Gucci Soho // Earrings // Julie Vos Bracelet // Allie + Bess stacked bracelet

Brighton Butler wearing free people smocked dress and miron crosby boots

Pregnancy No. 2 Q&A

Below are my answers to some of your questions about this pregnancy. Definitely keep in mind that I’m not an expert on pregnancy; I’m simply sharing my experience! Always talk to your doctor if you have questions or concerns about your pregnancy.

What’s your due date?

October 14, 2022

Do you want to know the gender before you deliver? 

Yes! Duncan really wanted to wait, but I just can’t. I HAVE to know! Maybe we will wait with our next one if we are blessed to have another!

How far apart will Four and this baby be?

20 months

Are you nervous about having 2 under 2?

Yes! I think the first 6 months will be tricky, but once we get the baby on a regular nap schedule, I’m thinking it’ll get easier. I’ve heard it’s hard, but that it’s so fun to have them be so close together and grow up to be good friends. 

Were y’all actively trying for a second child? 

Yes!

How many do y’all want? 

It depends on so many things, but in a perfect world, I’d love to have 3 or 4 kids. 

How long were you trying to conceive?

I’m hesitant to answer this because I know infertility is something so many people struggle with, but we were blessed and got pregnant the first month we tried. I’m cringing as I type that because I know some people’s stories are so different, and it doesn’t make sense. I actually wanted to start trying sooner because I was nervous it would be more difficult to get pregnant this time after talking with some friends that struggled. It’s crazy how you just never know until you know.

How are you feeling emotionally this time around?

Okay, so if you read my last post, then you might remember I really struggled emotionally last time. I was really sad and felt depressed during a lot of my pregnancy. It was really, really hard. I’m so thankful that this time around has not been nearly as bad. I was a little unstable and easily irritable at the beginning (sort of like PMS), but overall I’ve felt much more balanced this pregnancy. I am so thankful because I was really nervous about going through that again. Although I’m keeping my guard up for the rest of my pregnancy and postpartum, as I know things could change.

How early did you find out you were pregnant?

Since we were trying, I found out 2 weeks after I ovulated. So essentially, I found out the day of or after I was supposed to start my period. 

How did you tell Duncan you were pregnant this time?

I’m terrible at being cute with things like this. I took the test right before we went on a date, and I’m surprised I didn’t tell him right then and there while getting ready (he was waiting for me downstairs). But I put the cap back on the pregnancy test and put it in my purse. We ordered our entrees at dinner, and I said I had something I wanted to cheers to. Then I got the test out of my purse and slid it over to him!

How has this pregnancy been different than your first?

Overall, it has been much easier mentally, which has made all the difference. I think part of it is that I know what to expect, and the other part is that for some reason, my hormones haven’t been *as* out of control. I also have not had much physical pain this time around (yet, at least), whereas last time, I had so many aches and pains (even early on).

Additionally, I started showing like 5 weeks earlier this time around. I’m trying to think of what else is different but I think that about sums it up! 

Have you had different cravings/food aversions?

During this pregnancy, all food sounds gross but I also know that I NEED it. Honestly, all I can eat is carbs. As far as cravings, I’ve craved Sprite, chips & queso, and just any sort of bread. 

Do you feel like you started showing sooner this time?

1000% yes. I feel like I started to bloat even as early as week 6! I started showing more around 8-9 weeks, and then my belly button popped around 11 weeks, which is INSANELY early compared to last time!  

What are your top tips for morning sickness?

I tried everything. And I keep trying things too. NOTHING WORKS except keeping food in my stomach. But even that doesn’t really help for very long. It’ll take the edge off a little, but then after like 30 minutes, I’ll start feeling it again. For me, I rarely actually throw up (although I have several times this pregnancy… in public, too!). I do a lot of dry-heaving, which is dramatic and gross if you ask me. It’s also a bit uncontrollable – like once I start, I can’t stop. I hate it. 

Anyway, I’ve also found that car rides make it so much worse, so I try to avoid the car if I can lol (which isn’t realistic). I eat a lot of these ginger chews (like I probably eat one every single hour). Do they work? I don’t know, but it makes me feel better that I’m doing something. Last pregnancy, I sucked on these nonstop, but they were too sour for this pregnancy.

I never tried the morning sickness bands, but I did go so far as to order a vibrating bracelet lol. I didn’t end up trying it. I was desperate so I got on some meds that helped a little bit. But my nausea still always finds a way to break through in some way or another. I’m currently 12 weeks and a few days writing this, and it’s still going strong. I hope to get better soon!

Are you taking the Ritual prenatal vitamin again this time?

Yep! I absolutely love the Ritual prenatal. Sometimes it’s hard for me to take because I’m nauseous, but the lemon flavor helps a little bit. My Ritual code is BRIGHTON20.

Are you still working out with a trainer?

I actually was able to work out up until week 6, but then halfway through week 7, I literally couldn’t move. I haven’t worked out since. If I’m being honest, I don’t even go on walks, which is SO unlike me because I *love* walks! But with nausea, I just can’t do it. 

Were you nervous to ski while pregnant?

I was not, but I’m pretty confident on my snowboard! I took it easy too. I only did blues and avoided all blacks. I personally felt comfortable doing it, but it’s totally a personal choice when it comes to anything with risks while pregnant.

Do you feel differently about your body changing this time?

It was really hard at first because my body was changing, and I felt so out of control! Plus, I was eating like a teenage boy — and not because I wanted to. Most of the time, I wasn’t even hungry but I *had* to eat to take the edge off. Oftentimes, I’m force-feeding myself because I know I’ll feel better. I think early pregnancy is always mentally hard for women and their bodies because it’s such a squishy, bloated, and uncertain time. But now that I have a little bump, it doesn’t get to me as much. I’ve gained 6-7 pounds already, but I’ve sort of just let it all go. I eat what I want, when I want, and as much as I want. 

Do you find yourself doing anything differently this time around since you know what to expect?

I’m so much more relaxed this time around. I was a little stressed until I got to 8 weeks because of the risk of miscarriage. But once I got past that milestone, I started to feel better about everything. 

With my first pregnancy, I really struggled with giving myself grace. I didn’t know when I needed to push through and be tough versus when it was acceptable or okay to let myself be pregnant (if that makes sense?). This time, I’m so much nicer to myself. The moment I found out I was pregnant, I called my manager and we worked on a plan/strategy that allowed me to work less during February and March. I knew I’d be at about 60% capacity, so I took on a lot less work. During my first pregnancy, I tried to be Super Woman. 

This time, I let myself take days off or cancel on deadlines and move things around when I didn’t feel well. It was easier because I knew it was temporary. I knew everything would be okay, but that I needed to listen to my body. I didn’t have as much guilt or struggle as badly.

Plus, Duncan knew what to expect this around too. We both knew it would be really hard and that I’d be in bed a lot. I went to sleep almost every single night at 7 pm. And on the weekends, I would sometimes get in bed at 4 pm and stay there all night. If you’re in this season, just know it’s temporary. Vampire Diaries really got me through it lol. Sometimes I even felt too sick to watch, but I’d listen and fall asleep to it. 

Will you write an updated baby must-haves post?

Absolutely! I’m hoping we won’t have to buy much this time around. I feel like we spent so much last time, I want to make it work for round 2!

Will you share what you plan to register for with baby No. 2?

I probably won’t register for anything. However, I didn’t have a shower for my first pregnancy because of the pandemic and the fact that we were moving, so I’m hoping to do something sweet for this one. I’ll ask people not to bring gifts! But I won’t be able to help myself when it comes to clothes — I love monogrammed things!

Any recs on a parent/mother devotional?

I need to do a blog post specifically on this because I want to get answers from the BTD community and share what people suggest. I’ve only read a few parenting books and have leaned on Duncan in this department because I feel like he has read them all. He listens to a lot of podcasts and seems to always be talking with older, wiser men on the subject. I’m so thankful for this!

As far as devotionals/books, I’ve really enjoyed the following: 

Before You Were Born, I Knew You: Praying For Your Pregnancy, Birth, and Baby by Phylicia Masonheimer — This book is so good! The author shares her insight from several of her own pregnancies. She talks about how to integrate New Age philosophies about pregnancy and childbirth with a Christian worldview so you can feel empowered throughout your experience. 

Prayers for My Pregnancy notecards by The Daily Grace Co. — This is just a collection of 9 simple notecards that you can spend time on throughout your pregnancy. One side of the card has scripture to meditate and pray on and the other side has a prayer prompt to help you pray specifically for your own pregnancy and delivery. I found them so comforting during my last pregnancy and have loved them this time around too!

Praying Scripture for Motherhood Journal — This journal helps me during my quiet time to pray through different passages of Scripture that focus on motherhood. I feel like it prepares me for what’s to come AFTER pregnancy. I love that they give you guided instructions about how to pray over different Scripture and then provide commentary on the passages with questions to prompt prayer at the end.

Brighton Butler wearing free people smocked dress and miron crosby boots