One of the things I’m most thankful for in life is that my parents worked to raise us as confident people. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still something I struggle with EVERY SINGLE DAY, but it’s always been instilled in me. That I’m good enough. That I’m loved. And even though I know that in the back of my head, it doesn’t mean I don’t question decisions and feel like I have no idea what I’m doing with my life half of the time. Jesus has also been a serious source of confidence for me, knowing that He has a plan and that things are going to be OK. BUT, I still think there’s room for improvement – and even more importantly, reminders.
There are certain things we can all do each day to make us feel a little more confident – no matter our upbringing, what we believe in, or what kind of person we are. And I’m here to share 8 of those things!
Own your body language
Have you ever met someone who always stands up straight with their shoulders back, not crossing their arms, and just owning their body stance? You probably automatically felt their confidence (whether it was real or not). And then compare it to someone hunched over, crossing their arms or not facing you head on, and that person probably seems like they’re way less secure. Studies actually show that body language can change one’s confidence, but it also shows others that you are. Even if you have to fake it ’til you make it!
Being the first to introduce yourself – whether at an event or with a new person in a friend group – can go a long way with confidence. It might feel uncomfortable at first, but it’s one simple way to feel confident. Plus, knowing people’s names and truly remembering them will help you feel secure in social settings.
Remember how I said my parents always raised us to be confident? THIS is one of the biggest lessons they taught us – to speak your mind. To speak it even if other people don’t agree or have different opinions. To raise your hand in a class or whatever and let your thoughts be known (because they are SO valuable and worthy to be heard!). Next time you have the chance, try it. You’ll probably notice that you want to keep it in or not say anything because it’s uncomfortable, but force yourself. Even if it’s something small (like what you actually want for dinner!), say it! I have a feeling it’ll be really empowering.
Do something for yourself
This can be a confidence boost for a couple of reasons. One, it reminds yourself that you’re important and that your needs matter. No, this isn’t being selfish, it’s being smart. Secondly, it probably makes you feel really good! And it’s hard to be confidence when you’re not feeling good with yourself! Whatever makes you confident – whether that’s working out and staying in shape, doing a face mask and having beautiful skin, taking a bath to let your mind chill and open up space, reading the bible – do it. Every. Single. Day.
Look people in the eyes
I already mentioned body language, but this is SO important I wanted to call it out on its own. This is another thing that might feel kinda awkward at first, but it’s a power play, I promise. The more you do it, the easier the habit gets. Look people in the eye when they are talking to you or when you’re talking to them (instead of staring at the floor or whatever). Of course you can look away here and there, but try to go the majority of the conversation looking into people’s eyes.
Learn something new
For me, learning makes me feel GOOD. It makes me feel confident. I like to challenge myself and learning does that for me. Plus, I think being knowledgeable can be great in so many situations – like talking with strangers and friends, having opinions, etc. Try to learn something new as often as possible. That can be done from reading a book, learning a new word a day, listening to a podcast, whatever you want! Just know that you don’t have to be in school or learn a new language or something grand to improve your knowledge.
Say positive affirmations
This is probably either hit or miss for people, and I get it. Everyone is different and what works for some might not work for others. But I have heard SO many people rave about what positive affirmations can do, especially for confidence. I’ve even heard some of my personal mentors mention them. Looking into the mirror every morning and saying “I’m smart, I meant to be heard.” or “I’m beautiful and I’m thankful for my body” are good examples. They might feel cheesy at first, but they can’t hurt right? It’s crucial to teach your brain to think positive thoughts while replacing the negative ones.
Do something you don’t want to do
Facing fears can be monumental for growth (and for confidence). Think about it. Say you’re terrified of flying but get through a flight successfully. Though you might not notice it, your body/mind are feeling a little better about doing it again. And likewise, doing something you don’t want to do – like working out – can eventually form a habit of doing what’s hard. You know that boost you get after you finish something you’ve been putting off or not wanting to do? Think of how big of an impact facing a block/fear EVERY day could do! Try to do this thing in the morning, as we all tend to have more willpower then – and it’ll naturally give your entire day a boost of confidence!
What About You?
I hope this list serves you in some capacity – and I’d love to hear what gives YOU confidence. Is there a daily practice you have?
Brighton Your Day
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